Girls, trust me when I say I know the struggle; everywhere you look there’s another story to compare yours to. In school, and in every career, it is easy to measure your success by someone else’s. It is extremely hard to ignore the devil’s lies whispered in your ear as you fight to be content with who YOU are. Theodore Roosevelt once said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” Isn’t this so true? When comparing yourself to others, what is being accomplished? Does it bring glory to God? No. Does it bring joy? No. Comparison only leads to self deprecation, bitterness, jealousy, and disappointment.
I’m going to be honest. I’m sick and tired of hearing about what girls put themselves and others through. God created and called each and every one of us to be unique. Stop thinking you are supposed to be this “perfect” weight, or have this “perfect” body. We were built differently for a purpose. If we were identically built, what would make you special? Do you really want to be something you’re not? We disgrace the creativity God put into making us when we harm ourselves or treat each other as un-valuable.
CRAZY DIETING: Food is an amazing thing. In other parts of the world there are thousands of people starving, and even dying because they don’t have any. Don’t waste the enormous blessing of food we have. This does not mean eat whatever sounds good as a daily diet, we are fortunate to have a wide variety of healthy, protein filled food! And it certainly does not mean stop eating. I am completely against crazy diets – unless required or recommended by a doctor due to health issues. Make healthy choices, exercise a little, reward yourself with yummy treats here and there, and the result of that is what you were made to look like. Be happy with it!
MY CHOICES: A lot of people don’t want to listen to my opinion on this subject because I weigh bout 110 pounds. They somehow think my body is perfect, and that I don’t relate to them on any level. I may not struggle with gaining weight, but I have struggled with self image. I was always picked on because of how skinny I was as a child, even as a teenager. Comments would be made like – are you eating? You need more protein. Eat some meat! My metabolism is faster; I am built how I am and I am thankful for my uniqueness – regardless of what others think. Part of my body weight is due to my dancing schedule. I exercise a lot, but that is because I have a passion for dance, not because I’m desperate to maintain my current body weight. All of us deal with different image struggles. So no, I don’t diet, and I certainly don’t use self consciousness as an excuse to eat healthy. I try to make healthy choices to feel healthy, and to give my body more energy. Don’t diet to lose weight. Eat healthy to feel healthy. Remember that eating healthy does NOT mean you have to eliminate all the tasty food. It’s all about BALANCE.
DAILY DIET: Take your meals day by day. I like giving myself a free day once a week. Usually on my day off, I eat whatever sounds good, grease and all. My daily diet will be something like this: breakfast – a bagel, fruit, and OJ; lunch – a turkey sandwich, chips, lots of fruit, nuts, veggies, something sweet (like a cookie or piece of candy), and a drink; dinner – generally whatever my family is having, but always a full meal, and dessert; and a bunch of little snacks in between meals, and throughout the day to satisfy my active body. It’s amazing what food can do. A daily diet of healthy choices gives your body energy. It is vital to remember that healthy eating does NOT mean less food! It simply means a good amount of healthy, protein filled food. A junk day ever so often, or once a week is not a bad thing – so long as it does not become a habit. Food is a blessing, lets start treating it like one.
CONSEQUENCES: The consequences of comparison are costly. Doubts begin to creep in and make a home in your mind if you let them. Doubts turn into jealousy, and jealousy destroys relationships. Trust me I know, I’ve been there. Everyone doubts, but it’s what you do with them that counts. Comparison always leads to disappointment. If you try to look better than everyone else, you’ll always be disappointed. Beauty is NOT a competition. Other girls’ beauty does not define your own. Take your unique body as a blessing. Be confident in knowing that God created you the way you are for a reason.
NEGATIVITY: Negativity KILLS. Your negativity effects others; your own doubts are a weight on others’ shoulders. Encouragement is a great thing, but initially, it has to happen in your own heart. Treat yourself with positivity and it will rub off on others. Negativity is also contagious; your negative thoughts can drain out the positivity, even in the strongest minds.
OVERCONFIDENCE: We’ve established that confidence is a GOOD thing. However, some women become overconfident and selfish. There is something very classy and elegant about humility; while cockiness presents a stand-off, rude, immature, and vain attitude. The moment you put yourself above someone else crosses the line between confidence and cockiness. The key is to be confident in the uniqueness given to you by our divine Creator. Comparison is the biggest sign of insecurity, which is often covered up by a so called “confidence.” What’s wrong with being confident? Nothing so long as it is a surety found in Jesus and His love.
BENEATH THE SKIN: I care so deeply about each and every one of you. Beauty is not defined by outward appearance, but by what rests beneath the skin. Love yourself by accepting Gods love into your heart, and by loving others. Treat yourself as a valuable human being no matter what size, because that is precisely what you are. If you need a reminder every once in awhile, look up these Bible verses to remember how to be confident in God’s love, no matter how others treat you.
Galatians 6:4-5 “Each of you must examine your own actions. Then you can be proud of your own accomplishments without comparing yourself to others.”
1 Peter 3:3-4 “Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.”
1 Samuel 16:7 “But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”
Proverbs 31:30 “Charm is deceptive, and beauty if fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.”
2 Corinthians 10:12 “We wouldn’t put ourselves in the same class with or compare ourselves to those who are bold enough to make their own recommendations. Certainly, when they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves to themselves, they show how foolish they are.”
YOUR PURPOSE: The purpose of our creation was not to compare ourselves to one another. We were created as equals, yet unique individuals. Examine your OWN actions, not the actions of others, and be confident in who YOU are. If you focus on God and His love, positivity will shine through, and true confidence will come.